Braces bunch people

Does anyone have the email with the braces bunch first generation websites? I am just realizing that I only have the BB2 on my list and I don't have that email anymore? I don't want to bother JJ with this right now so if anyone else could help me out it would be FAN-TAB-ULOUS!

Now that hurt!!

I'm back from the HSG. The good news... No clogs, blockage or anything. He said that any little clogs that were there are gone because of the test. So that is good. Lets hope it gets me pregnant very soon!

The bad news... OUCH!!! It hurt!! Really..

They were putting in the speculum, "just like the OB", he says. Um no. That mofo cranked when he opened it and I swear I could feel it up to my shoulders! Then he went to insert the catheter. But, my cervix was cooperative. It migrated. I have no idea how. But, it packed up and migrated.

Eventually he inserted the catheter. It hurt but, not that bad. Then came the balloon! OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW! He only inflated in 1/3 of the way because it hurt so bad. They they slid me back like a invalid on a hospital bed. And they took the pictures. They inserted the dye. It hurt a little but, not as bad and the fecking balloon! Holy crap! That balloon!

He said, "everyone should hope to have a study like yours!" I liked that!

It was kind of cool to see. One tube was all pretty and upside down U shaped. The other was a little more squiggly.. Still a U shape but just not as perfectly U shaped as the other. He said it was still perfectly fine. Apparently there is a lot of variation in tube shapes.

So, all in all it was okay.

I just have one pet peeve. WHY OH WHY do doctors offices only have those pads that are large enough to absorb the Nile River. Seriously. They make you waddle!! Buy some thin pads with all your money. I know those offices can afford it. They are not broke!!

And now.. I am vomiting...

Great. I took My first two doses on antibiotics yesterday and the third right before I got in the shower this morning. This antibiotic is for my HSG test to, I guess, stop infection possibilities. So yeah, I ate breakfast, got in my car, opened the door and puked. Right on the driveway. Twice. Then I ran inside and proceeded to get violently ill. Really bad.

I called the doctor and they seem to think it is my antibiotics, not the Clomid. Thank god. I am going to start taking zithromax tonight and I am going to make darn sure that I eat a a full meal with it!!! YUCK!! I was so upset to be puking. My puppy dog came to my rescue and was up in my face while I was puking. Very cute, but, I wanted to kill her.

I am so so scared for the HSG. Tell me it won't be so bad. Will it? I am only working until 12 and then I have the test at 2. * My sister is taking me and she is not so good on the compassion thing. Remember she called me a infertile bitch a few months ago. YIKES.

Also my Cervical fluid is indicating Ovulation should be soon. Maybe this weekend. I asked the doctor and they told me to start using the OPK's a little earlier. Maybe Wednesday (cd11). I have a sono appointment for Saturday but, honestly, I think I will be Ovulating around that time. We'll see. I have been wrong before about that.

*UPDATE! The office called and wanted me to come in at 8am! I couldn't do that because then I would have to take the whole day off and I only get paid per-deim in summer school. So, I am going in at 12:15. Yikes. I am scared!!

Holy Hot Flashes Batman!!!

Good F-ing Lord!!

I have downed 4 doses of Clomid (1/2 a pill each) and have decided that all it is doing is cooking me from the inside out.

I feel like a menopausal woman! It is worse at night. Last night I never slept more than an hour consecutively. I was hot.. then cold... then okay.. then hot again. Covers on... covers off.. It was bad. I went to Jets practice yesterday (WHERE I FINALLY GOT BRAD SMITH TO AUTOGRAPH MY SHIRT*) and I was sitting in the pouring rain.. not cold at all.. Okay so that was good. But, when it started to get scary out we ran over to Cherbet's bar.. (WHERE I MET WAYNE CHERBET!!**) and I had a beer and all of the sudden I was dripping with sweat. I heard that the hot flashes are worse when you have alcohol.. Well they were. Fun fun.




* I waited forever to watch Brad Smith sign all the kiddies. Then he started to go back to the lockers. I panicked. Stephen yelled his name and something about his jersey. The rest was in Slow Motion. It was beautiful. He glanced over from the 50 yard line. Then he did a double take. Big Smile when he saw my jersey (Note: The NFL doesn't make his jersey yet. I had to get it specially made.. yes I am a stalker). He came running back to the endzone fence where I was. He goes, " I saw the jersey and I had to come over". That's right. I impressed him. So he signed it. He wrote "To Trisha, Brad Smith 16" I did tell him my name was spelled Tricia but, oh well. It still says Tricia, sort of. Stephen told him that I wouldn't let anyone else sign it. Which was true. Bubba Franks tried to sign it and I told him "no, only Brad Smith". He looked hurt. So I told him, "Bubba you already got my hat." Then he smiled. Brad Smith laughed at this. He is cool. My chest was pounding a little.

** So we go to Cherbets bar for a drink and wings during the lightning delay. We are waiting at the bar and who strolls out but WAYNE CHERBET. FUCKING LEGEND!!! So, We met him. I told him how much my grandpa would have loved to meet him. He didn't seem impressed. So, I told him that my grandpa was a Hofstra Alum and a Season Ticket Holder for the Jets. He smiled and said "Really, he went to Hofstra, Cool." That was for you Grandpa! Stephen got him to sign his Martin Jersey. Not the right player but they are both retired. So kind of okay.

Relaxing doesn't get you pregnant.

It doesn't. It just doesn't. And if one more person says it to me I am going to fucking scream.

Seriously, It is my fault a little. I am very open about our IF. But, how many times can I say, "I can relax all I want but, it doesn't make Stephen produce better sperm, it doesn't make me produce more eggs, and it DOESN'T stop me from having a miscarriage. It just doesn't."

I do get that stress doesn't help but, guess what, I can't forget that I want a baby. I can't go into a catatonic state at the doctor's so that I don't remember the appointments. I can't get rid of the other stressors. I can't stop worrying that my brother might start using drugs again and could die. I can't stop worrying about where I will be working next year since the numbers are down in the middle school. I can't stop the fact that money is tight. I just can't.

I having SUCH a hard time right now and I just want to do something silly to all those "just relax" people. Like something out of Harry Potter. Maybe I could make them vomit frogs or something.

GRRRRRRRR.

1/2 a pill of Clomid

So, when I went into the RE for my CD3 stuff today, I had to meet with one of the other doctors.

She was surpised that I was doing Clomid since she knew I was really scared to do it.

She said that she has had some nice results using only a half a pill of Clomid. (She even has seen nice results using 1/2 a pill over 3 days rather than 5 days.).

She recommends this for some of her patients who are scared of multiples.

She said if I try it and only produce one follie, well then I still have one follie for this IUI and next month I can try the whole pill. She said that the two of the three female doctors are trying 1/2 a pill on a lot of patients and my doctor is not. I have no idea why.

So, I talked to Stephen and he really wants me to try the 1/2 of a pill.

So, that's what we are doing, for 5 days.

Hopefully it works. She said I might see 2-3 follies rather than 3-4 follies.

What do you think? Am I being stupid?

Asthma and HSG

So, I got the nurse on the phone. Apparently the dye is a shellfish derivative and could cause asthma symptoms. I explained that mine was very mild and I am NOT allergic to shellfish. They said I would have to go on six days of prednisone!! Kill me.

But, then the nurse called back and said the doctor at the radiology office said I didn't need it. I don't know why? I didn't ask questions.

I am going for the HSG on Tuesday at 2pm. My sister is going to take me. This should be fun. Do you remember my post from when I went camping. She is pleasure to hang out with. I don't want DH to waste anymore days off. I really want to go away in August and I want him to take off for the IUI's. I think they count more.

So, yeah.. asthma and shellfish and hsg. Who knew?